So it's been a while since we wrote, due to holidays and finals and all that shit, so we are just gonna jump into it.
Okay so Jenelle and I wanted to talk about fitness in one post, because we both have been going to the gym and we really like talking about it. But over the holidays we kind of stopped going and we both feel kind of shitty about it but it's honestly just so hard to get motivated to exercise when you could be hanging out with your family who you never see, or your family who you always see but love anyways. Also, since I went home for the holidays my whole routine got kind of messed up and I haven't done cardio in like two weeks.
ANYWAYS, I just wanted to write about some things that I feel when it comes to "getting milked" or being "up in the gym just working on my fitness fergalicious".
I started out going to the gym because I wanted to lose weight (mostly boob weight). I hardly even have a reason to want that, but you know how society pressures everyone and blah blah blah.
But after I began going to the gym I noticed that I was feeling better on the inside. Like, I barely saw a difference physically because it takes a while, but I was less moody, more energetic, felt like doing more of my hobbies, etc etc. So then that was the motivator for continuing on. Because feeling happy and having energy is always something that I've longed for. It's so gosh dang important.
Now, after going for a while, I started noticing a physical difference. Which feels great, but adds a more complicated side to it. Now my motivator was to keep the weight off, or build a better booty, or get those oblique lines. I do love having multiple forms of motivation, but I just felt like it wasn't the healthiest motivator because it had less to do about how i felt and more about how i looked. And I think i already care enough about how i look and not enough about how i feel.
ANYWAYS I found a solution and another form or motivation which is really fun. I want to be strong enough that I'll feel confident to take a kickboxing class or learn krav maga. I want to work out so that I can one day take my boyfriend down. I like the idea that I'd be able to defend myself if the situation ever arose. And being strong would be nice! I would feel like I could take care of myself if when the apocalypse happens.
So I've been suuuuper shitty with working out lately (sorry, Megan, I haven't been keeping you updated on that) for a few reasons. Mostly because I can't afford another gym membership which isn't an excuse but I'm too stressed about money to care, and also because I'm starting to get pretty stressed out about going to school again and my stress literally just freezes me, and that sucks.
I had been going to the gym for about six months though, so I feel like that compared to my month and a half off ain't too bad, but I've noticed lots of changes without going already.
The worst thing for me about taking time off from the gym is that not going to the gym makes you lazy, but you're so lazy that you can't even imagine going to the gym, so it's just a vicious circle. I'm still in lazy mode, but I'm planning on trying to get back into it once school starts, kind of make a schedule up for myself again. Money is a big thing though and I'm just trying to keep that in mind.
What Megan was saying about body image really started to effect me too. When I first started working out, I was so focused on being thinner but the longer I worked out for, I became way more focused on how strong I was getting. I was SO excited when I could leg press 120 lbs. which probably isn't a big deal to some people but I was just like "wow, my body is capable of that and it's so EXCITING", and feeling that excited about your body's capabilities is way more rewarding than feeling like you look more desirable to strangers because who cares except them, you know? The people in your life who really love you won't care about what you look like and they'll be happy that you're doing something for yourself that makes you feel strong and healthy more than anything.
I think Megan and I mostly wanted to write this post because we have no idea what we're talking about and we want other people who don't know anything about working out to know that you don't really have to know anything to do it. It's really easy and simple to just do whatever works for you physically, as much or as little as that may be. All that really matters is that you're doing something good for your body. That being said, I'm going try to start going for walks just so I'm doing something because unlike most things in this world, walking is FREE dude.
Anyways, this post was a lot less organized than I was hoping, but I think Jenelle summed it up nicely. It doesn't matter what you're doing it for, as long as you do something. Even just a walk can help clear the brain and relax the mind. We have no idea what we're doing. Don't listen to us.
Okay, so I guess we're writing this as sort of a diary.
A big diary full of secrets and curse words and make up tips. Probably more curse words than you'd like to read.
We wanted to start off with a list of things to make you and us and most people feel better. These are things that we're constantly telling each other and things that we should be telling ourselves always. We're honestly such good friends to each other. SUCH. GOOD. FRIENDS.
(P.S. The different colours of text are so you can tell us apart, if you haven't already caught on to that.)
So here we gooooo! WOOO!
1. You're not crazy. I can't even count the amount of times in my life where I've apologized for being crazy. There's this stigma surrounding women that jealousy, and being offended by certain things, and wanting attention make us crazy but that's not true. We've been raised in a society that's taught us to compete with other women. A society that wants us to feel less than we are. A society that wants us to be okay with being looked down on. And being mad about that and voicing how you feel about it does not make you crazy. It makes you a strong person who knows what she wants and if other people choose to see that as crazy then so be it, but just know that you're not. You're allowed to ask questions, you're allowed to speak your mind, and you're allowed to want attention goddamn it! I always hate that women are made to feel "naggy" when they're just expressing their feelings or telling someone they wish they would pay more attention to them. It's not a bad thing to want and need attention. If someone calls you needy or naggy then thats their problem. Everyone just wants to feel wanted.
2. Its okay to wear a cake layer of makeup on your face and it's okay to not wear any at all. It's okay to only wear a little bit. It's okay if you don't even understand make-up. It's okay if you present as male and you wear makeup! I have a hard time with this one, because I'm surrounded by so many men who tell me they prefer women without makeup and women who tell me they don't wear makeup to make a point. And, like, all of that is totally valid, but it should have no effect on how I present myself. Like, yeah dude, if you prefer girls who wear no makeup and shit, that's awesome, but why would that effect any of the decisions I make for myself? Like I'm not gonna just start not wearing makeup because you said that. You don't need to live up to other peoples' expectations. I wear a face full of makeup and I feel beautiful. Sometimes I'll go a couple days without it. That's okay. I still love my face. I always see girls with no makeup on the bus and applaud them. But then I see those girls at Sephora and applaud them too. You girls are brave regardless of what you wear on your face. In a society like we have, it's almost impossible to satisfy anyone so just do me a favour and satisfy yourself.
3. Befriend yourself. You know when your friend is having a really bad day and you try to do everything possible to cheer them up? You're allowed to do that for yourself too. If you'd tell your friend to drink a nice cup of tea and watch an episode of Sex and the City or count to ten and breathe deeply or go to the gym and sweat it out (!!!!!) or do a little yoga, take your own advice. You're allowed to treat yourself like you love yourself. I'm still learning how to do this, I'm definitely not an expert, but I know that it's important in feeling good.
4. If you forget your chicken in the oven for 3 hours and accidentally make the house smell like burnt chicken and turn it into jerky, it's forgivable. I just did that. (This is so funny omg)
5. Crying doesn't make you weak. This is a huuuuuge one for me. I cry so damn much I don't know what to do with myself. I could literally water lawns with the amount of tears I cry in a week. And it's not because I'm sad all the time, it is the odd time but for the most part it isn't. I'm just so sensitive and things get to my heart immediately. I've always felt like this makes me a really difficult person. I have a hard time saying my feelings out loud because I immediately cry even if I'm not sad and then I can't formulate sentences or say my thoughts the way I want to at all. I'm still adjusting to this and unfortunately, the older I get the more emotional I become. Fucking hormones, man. I used to (and still sometimes do) keep my feelings inside because it's just so hard for me to explain myself. But I'm slowly learning to speak through my tears and know that my feelings still matter even if they're hard to understand, and if the people in your life love you (which praise some imaginary lord somewhere, I have the most loving people in my life) they'll listen, no matter what. Lately I've been trying to not think about things that make me sad and I push everything to the back of my mind until one small thing happens and I can't stop crying. Like the other day I saw a play and I cried during a happy musical number and just learned that I should probably just face my sadness and allow myself to cry when I need to. Crying is healthy and a good way to burn off the stress hormone (cortisol) is through tears!
6. You shouldn't feel guilty about any of your pleasures. I used to always be so self conscious about what people thought about my taste in film or music or even books. Me too! This is such a good one. But I learned that no one is really THAT cool that they have the right to judge you on any one of those things. I listen to Fall Out Boy religiously, I don't have any interest in learning about Lars Von Trier and Dogme 95 because I love watching horrible movies like She's the Man or Bring It On, AND I love the oh-so-problematic Twilight books AND the movies. I listen to ABBA on a daily basis and I know for a fact that no one listens to My Chemical Romance anymore besides me. I just found out that they brought the store HotTopic to Canada and I'm gonna shop there on the regular. I've seen Lord of the Rings more times than I can count. Sometimes I'll buy a Cosmopolitan just for the sex tips. I've played over 20 Nancy Drew mystery games on PC. I played the Kardashian game on my phone TWICE. I HAVE HORRIBLE TASTE. But it's great to me. I love my taste. It all makes me feel good. and honestly life is so hard that there shouldn't be anything or anyone stopping you from indulging in your horrible taste and guilty pleasures. Now go listen to those 4 Panic! At The Disco albums. You deserve it. All of these things are so cute, and that's another thing too: if you are around people who make you feel ashamed for the things that you like, they're assholes and you need to get rid of them immediately, or at least just tell them they're assholes. Anyone who makes you feel inadequate or stupid because you have an obsession with little baby and puppy videos (me) or you like to shape your eyebrows more than you should because it's FUN and you love it (also me) can suck a butt. They're not worth your time and you need to surround yourself with people who appreciate and treasure everything about you even if they don't necessarily enjoy the same things.
7. Don't work out to be skinnier. Another one I struggle with sighhhhh. I'm not saying I think I'm fat and I'm not asking for that kind of attention but there's that constant pressure put on girls to look a certain way and society and blah blah blah and social norms and the beauty industry and blah blah and bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. But the point is, it does weigh down on me and makes me feel pretty terrible sometimes, just like I'm sure it does to a lot of other people too. Megan said this thing to me once (thank you, friend) about working out and how she does it just to feel like she's doing something good for her body and I just had a moment where I was like "duhhhh??!!!" Like, this thought had never even crossed my mind. I got so caught up in images and people's butts being firmer than mine and looking good in tight clothes that I totally forgot I should be working out to be healthier and that's all. All of the benefits of being healthy (weight loss, muscle tone, etc.) will happen if I just focus on being stronger and healthier than I was the day before. I've been slacking on the gym lately and I have no excuses, but when I do go, I enjoy it SO MUCH just because all of that silly "skinny" pressure is taken off when I focus on my insides instead. Also, as mentioned above with the crying, sweat is another way to burn off the stress hormones and also releases endorphins which is why those people that do crossfit are always so goddamn fucking happy. But if you just do some normal exercises every day, even stretching is good for your body, then you'll feel a lot less stressed and anxious! (I'm not a doctor I'm only speaking from personal experience and what I've read on LIVESTRONG lol)
Hello readers! I've never written a blog before, and my social media presence is mainly me posting pictures of my cute face on instagram, but other than that I'm pretty shy. (This shy temptress's name is Megan by the way, she's dope.)
I think my biggest problem is that I'm worried that people don't care about what I have to say. Which definitely could be the case and I don't want you to feel bad for not reading the rest of this or any of our other posts. You're totally allowed to not like me or my writing, but I just want you to know that my counter part, and bestest friend Jenelle, is a much better writer than me.
So I mean, I'd stay tuned, you know, for her. And ALSO because we're gonna make you feel really good about yourself and give you a platform to express your feelings.
So theres that.
Hi there! I'm Jenelle. I feel like everyone should care about what Megan has to say just like everyone should care about what everyone has to say but that's just me. I used to write a blog but I'm just sick of it and I wrote a lot of douchey stuff and I love Megan and I wanted to do something creative where we use our brains together and come up with smart conclusions about life and being women and how we feel* about everything. We live far away from each other and maybe see each other two times a year if we're lucky but we've been best friends since we were five so there's a pretty strong connection there. We talk pretty much every day about pretty much everything and it is sooooo awesome. I feel comfortable telling her anything and we can always rely on each other for advice and help with anything going on with either of us. Seriously dudes, Jenelle is super sweet and honestly my best friend and you need to hang out with her because she's amazing. We are actually so nice to each other too and I think thats a really good take away of what this blog means. Its so important to be nice to people in general, but to have your girls' backs and make them feel safe is something I really believe in. We ain't here to shame anyone.
The reason I'm telling you this is because I kind of want this blog to be like our conversations: only on cyberspace, supportive, comfortable, loving, funny, and helpful.
I think there's a lot of stuff on the internet that's supposed to make you feel better, but it just never does. Like there's so much stuff on Pinterest about working out (which is so FUN and good for you!!!!! But we'll talk about that later) but then there's also all sorts of bullshit like "10 exercises to slim down 10 MINUTES before a BIG DATE so he'll want to marry you!!!!" (lol, that was basically it though) which is an exaggeration of a thing I saw once but the idea is pretty much the same. I just really want to have a blog that focuses on people feeling good for themselves and loving themselves and not feeling like they have to change who they are at all. Aaaaand I hope Megan agrees with me or else this could get interesting. (I AGREE)
Also we wanted to name the blog something funny so we named it after that terrible porno that I've never even seen (We should probably post a video of the inspiration just so everyone is on the same wavelength...) because everyone our age will get it and older relatives on Facebook won't know and will think "Oh that's so sweet!" except I just said it now sooo moving on...
*I think that "feel" is going to be a pretty big word in this blog, just in case you're not interested in that, we warned you.
Anyways, that's it, that's what we're doing here so if you want to stick around and see what the fuck we're trying to figure out about our live next, please do! We'd love to have you, honestly.
